Simply Irresistible (Crescent Cove Book 2) Page 18

  Wait a minute. This felt much too real. Too urgent. And beyond wonderful.

  My eyes snapped open.

  “Crap.” I scrambled backward, dislodging the covers, rising up onto my knees. I gaped at Roan, who still looked asleep. Just in case he was aware of what had gone on, I said, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been sprawling all over you.”

  Damn, had I really trailed my fingers along his abs? Please tell me I hadn’t groped him. Or licked his nipple with my tongue. I’d die if he called me on it. He’d be justified in telling me I needed to back off and leave him alone. The heat of embarrassment shot through me, and my skin pinkened from shame.

  My heart still beat a furious tattoo in my chest, and it wasn’t solely from mortification.

  His eyes slid open, and he stared at me through a hooded gaze, while one hand rose up to cup his neck. When I’d ripped the covers back in my flight, I’d exposed his bare chest. His hard abs. His boxers.

  Hell, I must’ve groped him there because he’d responded. Not that he was responding to me. In his dreamland, he was probably in bed with some other woman—anyone but me—and his fantasy lady had touched him.

  Any minute now, he’d lay out the sleeping ground rules for this vacation. Or stomp down to the front desk—once he controlled his hard-on and dressed—to demand a room with two beds. Or two rooms with two beds.

  If I lived through the humiliation, and he was still willing to share a room with me, I’d nod and promise to be more careful. Assuming I could make my fingers and body behave.

  Climbing off the bed, I backed up, running into the wall outside the bathroom.

  Roan rose from the bed and padded around the end, stalking me.

  Now I was in for it.

  Ignore how sexy he is. I dragged my eyes off his tented shorts, directing them at the ceiling. Roan didn’t stop until he crowded my space. I squeaked when the back of his hand stroked down my cheek. My eyes slid to half-mast, and my lips parted. I sighed because this was torture. Barely touching me, he could still take me beyond ecstasy.

  I sagged against the wall, my PJ top shifting and tightening across my front, revealing my peaked nipples.

  His ragged breath on my neck made rampant desire unfurl inside me.

  Everything about him, from his sleep-tousled hair to his warm, hazel eyes, shouted sex. His boxers rode low on his hips, and he wasn’t doing a damned thing to hide his body’s reaction.

  Why wasn’t he chastising me or pretending none of it had happened?

  “Cara,” he whispered. He rested his forehead against mine while his hand slid from my shoulder to my forearm in a heavy caress. He palmed my butt and pulled me fully against him.

  While he may not love me, it was clear he found me attractive.

  And I…Well, I loved him. No use denying it. I’d never stopped loving him.

  Eyes closing, I leaned into him, taking in the thrill of having him near. A soft moan eased past my lips. Tension swirled, a rich musk in the air between us, overloading my senses with want.

  Shifting closer, his tongue teased my earlobe before he took the whole of it into his mouth and sucked gently. Electricity arced through me, and I moaned again. I grabbed his shoulders, tipping my head back as he feather-kissed down to the top of my PJs.

  I needed his mouth on mine more than I needed to breathe. “Roan.”

  He lifted his head and stared at me. “I’ll never push you. Ever. But you need to tell me what you want from me.” No mistaking the lust screaming through in his words.

  Raw need eddied around us, a whirlpool that threatened to pull me down and never let go.

  I wanted. I ached for him. His touch, his mouth, his arms. All he had to give.

  But he didn’t love me. He wanted me, just like he had back in college.

  And I wasn’t sure I had it in me to trust him again.

  Ducking underneath his arm, I escaped into the bathroom. Inside, I drooped against the closed door and sighed, rubbing my face.

  Roan had definitely come on to me. No mistaking his tongue action, his hands, and his erection for anything else.

  If I wanted, I could take him to bed. Give in to my every need.

  What about the morning after? Jason wasn’t here to bring Roan the equivalent of a junior high note that said, Do you love me? Check Yes or No.

  I refused to let myself get involved if this wasn’t real. This wasn’t about a burst of hot grinding sex. Well, in some ways it was because I wanted his sex, the hotter the grind the better. This was about us. And my little girl who waited for me at home. The one my in-laws were determined to steal away.

  Married, we could behave however we chose. Did I dare take the same chance I had that night after graduation? If he rejected me again, I wasn’t sure I’d recover. Wanting but never having all of him would kill me.

  When I emerged, he strode past me into the bathroom, where he shut the door, showered, and dressed. Saying nothing about what happened.

  Had I dreamed it all?

  No, the flinty look in his eyes as we went downstairs to breakfast told me he was processing this, like me. Did I dare ask him to share his thoughts? Maybe we were going to act like it never happened. My sinking gut told me I didn’t like that idea. But what did I truly want? He was right to ask that question.

  After eating from the buffet, we sat in awkward silence broken only by our tea cups clinking back on our saucers.

  “I thought we could hike to a waterfall today,” Roan eventually said. His eyes hadn’t met mine since we’d left our room.

  Inside, I crumpled. Had I really dreamed he might want me as much as I wanted him?

  Having feelings for someone who didn’t return them was the pits. It would rip me apart. I couldn’t keep pretending I only wanted friendship when I needed so much more.

  What about that vow to Jason?

  The hell with the vow. After making it in haste, I lived in regret.

  If I gave myself to Roan, declared my feelings, what was the worst he could do?

  Crush my heart. Not under his heel, but with the sympathy in his eyes and words that pushed me away. Better to feel awkward than deal with his rejection all over again.

  After returning to the room only long enough to change into our bathing suits and cover them up with shorts and tees, we took a cab to La Fortuna Waterfall. A few tour buses and dusty cars were parked in the shade, but if tourists were about, they were making themselves scarce.

  After paying, we followed directions to stairs leading down to the falls. Five hundred stairs, to be exact. Made up of wood and concrete, they’d been carved into the steep hillside. The trail wove in switchbacks, taking us deeper into the lush valley at the base of the dormant Chato volcano. A tropical jungle made up of enormous trees, flowers, and scraggly vegetation grew in profusion to our left. Vines snaked along the cliff face on our right, where plants had taken root in tiny pockets of soil. Stone pillars supported a chain rail we grasped to slow our progress down the rougher parts.

  Sweat soon trickled down my back. The humidity level was so high, the air practically steamed.

  By the time we reached the bottom, my legs wiggled like rubber. How would I find the energy to climb back to the top? We came to a level area with a covered bridge that took us over a mass of dense bushes.

  A short path to the right led to an overlook. The falls plunged down in front of us, dropping hundreds of feet to land in a huge circular pool. Plants and trees grew along the sides of the canyon face, intertwined with vines. Birds darted about, sipping from the oasis.

  “Wow.” I savored the cool mist drifting our way.

  “Gorgeous.” Roan took pictures with his phone, some with the falls behind me. “I’ll send those to your dad and Arie.”

  “Thanks.” I nodded to his phone. “Can I take some for your mom and Sam?”

  A woman on the path must’ve heard my question. “Would you like me to take a few pictures of you two?”

  We posed together, Roan’s arm loo
se around my shoulders. In one shot, I smiled while he stared down at me, something unreadable in his eyes. He leaned forward and kissed my cheek.

  Taking his phone back, I teased him into posing with a variety of backgrounds. I snuck in a few close-ups that I accidentally-on-purpose sent to my own phone so I could devour them later.

  While he stared toward the falls, I scrolled through the pictures, pausing to study the one with the kiss.

  My heart in my eyes, I looked up at him. And the joy on his face when he looked down at me…

  Some cultures believed that if you took someone’s picture, you captured their soul. Plenty of the times, I’d worried Roan had captured my soul, that I’d lost parts of myself I’d never recover.

  From Roan’s expression in this picture, it looked like I’d captured his soul.

  Ahh.

  I blinked, finding tears in my eyes. Who would’ve thought?

  Roan strolled over and took back his phone. While he tucked it into his pack, I smudged away my tears. Grabbing the metal rail, I peered over the edge. People sunned themselves on huge wet rocks fronting the pool. A few brave souls swam or stood in the shallow water, but none dared get too close to the plunging water.

  No matter how I tried to distract myself, I couldn’t forget what I’d seen in Roan’s eyes.

  I wanted so much to believe what I’d seen. Did I dare? I’d never been a risk-taker, but maybe, just this once, I had to try.

  “Ready for more?” Roan asked.

  At my nod, we continued on to an open, rocky beach around the bend from the waterfall. People swam, while others walked upstream toward the falls. We peeled off our outer clothing, tucking everything inside Roan’s backpack. Picking our way over a jumble of smooth stones to the river, we stepped in.

  Someone had thrown ice cubes into the water. Goosebumps rippled along my skin as I splashed in further. “Brr.” I rubbed my arms and stalled before the water hit my knees.

  Roan strode past me, wading in as if this was a lake back home in high summer. Splashing. Hopefully, not on purpose, or he’d taste my glare. If I could find one.

  I couldn’t forget that picture.

  He plunged under the water. Further out, he popped up and turned to face me. Water dripped from his saturated hair. “Come on in. It’s great.”

  I shook my head, amazed he could take on an icicle bath and act like it was as pleasant as the hot spring spas back at Baldi. “Too freaking cold.”

  “You can do it.” He moved closer, keeping all but the top of his shoulders immersed. Drops beaded on his eyelashes in tiny diamonds. “You’ll love it.” He flicked water at me.

  Cringing, I backed toward the shore. “Stop it.”

  “Want me to get you wet?”

  Talk about a weighted question.

  “I’m glad to help.” No denying the tease in his words. He sent more water my way.

  Help. Right. “Don’t you dare.”

  He swam closer. Standing, he flicked back his hair. Water trickled down his chest. A Greek god had come to life before my eyes. Smirking, he trickled drops onto my shoulder, an icy caress.

  “Cara,” he sang in a husky voice, his eyes focused on mine. “Come into the water, honey.”

  “I’ll do it on my own.” I pushed on his chest. “Back off, buddy.”

  “Buddy, huh?” A glint lit up his face. “How about I help you in, buddy?”

  Before my shriek could erupt, he’d swept me off my feet and was striding into the river.

  “You need to stop hauling me around all the time.” Because I could probably get away with it, I wrapped strands of his hair around my fingers.

  He grinned down at me. “What if I like hauling you around? You telling me you’re not having fun?”

  It was fun being held in his arms. Savoring the broad grin on his face. But he was a trickster from way back. “Put me down.”

  He tickled my hip, making me squirm. “You sure?”

  “Yes!”

  “If you say so.” He tossed me forward.

  “Eeeep!” My squeal was cut off when I fell into the river. Erupting to the surface, I stood, sputtering. My hair hung in my face like seaweed, and I shoved it back. “Funny, Roan. Way to act as if we’re in third grade.”

  “That’s fifth grade, honey.” A wealth of smugness hung in his words. He swam toward me and stopped, remaining underneath the water with only his head exposed. His hair was slicked back like a wet seal’s. “See? Knew you’d love it.” Tipping his head back, he leveled himself on the top and glided, letting the slow current tug him downstream. He drifted until he reached a bend in the river, and then flipped over and swam back in broad strokes. Halting in front of me, he linked his hands with mine, tugging me forward. “Do it with me. It’s like you’re suspended in a cocoon. The sensation is incredible.”

  At this moment, I’d do anything he asked.

  Coolness swirled across my body, releasing my tension. The rush and pull of the water soothed me. Tourist laughter faded as the swell of the Costa Rican jungle replaced it. Insects buzzed, birds cheeped, and frogs croaked. A regular forest symphony.

  We existed in our very own world.

  We floated around the bend, moving past vegetation encroaching on each side. Overhead, trees created a linked green canopy. The wind stirred the branches, and as they swayed, their tiny leaves danced.

  A howler monkey called out, a screechy-hoot. “Whoop-whoop-whoop.”

  “You order zombies?” Roan asked.

  My laughter filled the air, silencing the insects and birds. “I set ‘em free last night. Hope they’re not hungry.”

  We came to a large pool and stopped, treading water.

  I’d been eating my nerves, trying to drum up the courage to speak of feelings. It wasn’t easy baring your soul, especially to someone who’d rejected you in the past. But his eyes in that photo…I had to know if this was one-sided.

  Before I could spill a thing, Roan took my hand and floated on his back. “It’s paradise.” His voice deepened. “I’m glad you’re here with me.”

  I needed to see his face, to see if his expression matched the emotion in his words.

  “Me, too.” My words came out husky, equally vulnerable.

  We floated closer to shore, where our feet touched the bottom.

  Gliding nearer, my heart raw and ragged, I smoothed the damp hair off his face. This was it. No turning back. Six years ago, I’d run. Today, I wouldn’t give up until he told me there would never be an us.

  His eyes moved to my mouth. “Cara. I…” His features tightened, and he lifted his gaze skyward, blinking.

  My mouth flashed dry. “I want to kiss you, Roan.”

  Roan

  She…wanted to kiss me? I must’ve misheard her. No way in hell would she tell me that.

  After I’d touched her, caressed her in our bed, stalked her across the room, and then told her of my need, she’d run away.

  I’d thought she’d hated me.

  While I’d crossed the line we’d drawn when we married, I couldn’t help it.

  I loved her.

  Waking with her in my arms, her soft fingers stroking my body, had almost undone me. I’d come damn close to rolling her over and taking what she seemed to be offering. Until I’d read the uncertainty in her eyes and knew I’d put it there.

  We needed to have this out. Holding myself away from her was killing me. Better she outright tells me we’d never have more than friendship, than for me to keep hoping. Needing.

  I lifted my eyes and watched her pupils dilate. Her pink tongue reached out to touch her top lip.

  She wasn’t backing away. Or telling me to get lost. If I didn’t know better, I’d think she really had said she wanted to kiss me.

  My pulse roared through me.

  “You asked me to make this clear, so I will,” she said. “I want you.” Her eyes lowered and a pretty blush filled her cheeks. When she lifted them again, a soft smile played on her lips. “I hope it’s okay to tell
you that.”

  “You sure?” I gently lifted her chin so I could read her expression. My love for her had to blaze in mine. “Because I want you so much.”

  “Oh, Roan!” Cara jumped into my arms, wrapping her arms around my shoulders, her legs around my waist. Her lips met mine. Opening her mouth, she let me in. And I took. Gave. Groaned.

  My body shook as reaction took hold. When her tongue flicked mine, blood surged between my legs. Everything inside me strained toward her.

  Her soft moan hummed through my veins, and I didn’t care that my legs shook. This was Cara, kissing me, wanting me. Letting me touch her.

  I smoothed my hands along her water-slicked back. Cupped her cute ass. Pulled her against me.

  When she shifted out of my arms, I groaned.

  She smiled. Reaching for the bikini tie at her neck, she glanced around. “You think we’re alone?”

  We damn well better be alone. I’d roar like a beast if anyone came near us now.

  “What are you planning, honey?” My voice rumbled in my chest, threaded through with heavy emotion. Plus, a touch of fear. How could this be happening?

  She tugged on the string again but paused before pulling it free. When she lifted her head and stared boldly at me, I read every dream I’d ever had about her in her eyes.

  Moving closer to her, I stroked her shoulder. Slid my fingertips across her chest to cup her breast through her top. Thumbed her pert nipple.

  “I know Jason meant everything to you,” I whispered.

  She started to speak, but I put a fingertip on her lips. Maybe this wasn’t the time. What man would talk about a dead husband when the woman he ached to be with stood before him with need in her eyes?

  But I had to speak my peace. Unburden my heart.

  “Let me finish.” Releasing her, I dropped my hands down to take hers. I glanced away, sucking in air. “I know you loved him more than anything in the world.” While she digested the comment, I nodded slowly. “But he’s gone and you’re here. I’m here. I’m just hoping…” My insides clenched. “I can never be what he was to you, but maybe there’s a tiny place in your heart left for me.”